Hope does not disappoint us (Rom 5:5)
I often tell people that my life has been one dream come true after another. Indeed, many of my favorite imaginations have become realities as my life has unfolded. When I talk about it, I know myself that it all sounds to good too be true. That is because simply a listing of the dreams realized does not include any of the process along the way. Sometimes the way was very long and difficult.
Quite often, my dreams have been unrealistic, even stubborn, and I have been known to cling to the idea of something I want to the point of forgetting why, dismissing other possibilities, and looking past God by focusing only on attaining my goal. Sure, I have prayed that the Lord would give me the desires of my heart (see Psalm 37:4), but there have been times when I really have not been able to tell the difference between the desire of my heart and the desire of my will.
As a decisive and risk-taking person, I have pursued dream after dream, often to come back to reality, disappointed that I am still the same person with my same needs. In the most difficult of times, I have felt and believed that my life is just one disappointment after another. Perhaps Jesus, too, was no stranger to disillusionment. We read in the gospels about the miracles and the great teachings, but not much about what happened in between. Searching for faithful disciples alone must have been discouraging with so few that were willing to give up all they had to follow him. Jesus started every day of his public ministry knowing that he held a message of truth for all people, but yet his words were met with resistance and ridicule. To persevere, he had to hold onto the faith and hope that God, his Father, would come through for him. Without hope, the disappointment of a human life that ended nailed to a cross would be tremendous.
So, is my life a huge disappointment or a living dream? Actually, it is both. When I talk to people about it, the hope inspired by Jesus enlivens my story. Jesus as God incarnate could handle “God-sized” disappointments, so I can hope that mine which are merely human will be redeemed as well.
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